I got the best of me. If my diet and exercise plan were on the internet it would be stamped with the words "FAIL" on it. I am nearly back up to my heaviest weight. yuckity yuckerton.
Maybe I'm being too hard on myself... since I really haven't had a diet and exercise plan for the better part of 2012. I could sit here and make excuses about my schedule and how busy I was with Police Academy, but I'm not going to. I'm just going to move on and get back to losing. Its as simple as that. I just need to focus on my plan and do it. As Curtis (our PT Instructor) would say during academy - "Nothin' to it but to do it!".
I haven't been hard enough on myself when it comes to willpower and perseverance. I don't know what it is about food, it really feels like an addiction to me - or as close to what I imagine an addiction would feel like as I've never actually had one. But why else would someone repeatedly engage in activity that is harmful to their health, right? I make poor food choices and I overeat. I know its bad for me, I know its wrong and counterproductive to my health and fitness goals, but somewhere inside of me I DON'T CARE. Or at least thats how I feel when the food is there in front of me, or when I'm thinking about it. I don't care about the consequences, I want it and I want it now.
Anyhow, I digress, I am not going to let this become a pity party. I am not pitiful, I actually feel accomplished and happy with everything I've done this year. I have to focus on everything I did right this year... and I did do a lot of right this year. I need to focus that positive energy and drive to my newest goal - getting back to a healthy weight and feeling fit and strong again. I've set so many goals for myself over the past few years and I've met all of them but this one. So this is it. This is my ONLY goal for 2013. Fit & Healthy to go with my Happy.
Nothin' to it but to do it.